A Winter Sabbatical (Books We Love holiday romance) Read online

  It was going to be a long day – a very long day.

  “I’m sorry, Marissa,” Travis brushed a kiss across her cheek. “I don’t want to go, but Jonah will be looking to be fed soon.”

  She didn’t want him to go either. She was right – Travis had been her rock of Gibraltar, but if he had to go, then he had to go.

  Marissa forced herself not to sigh. He would hear it, and stay whether he wanted to or not. And then she would feel guilty – a whole vicious circle.

  “Thanks for everything.” She would not let him know how much it upset her for him to leave. “Guess I’ll see you around.” That was that, then.

  He looked at her quizzically. “Don’t you want me to come back?” Travis looked hurt. Did she misunderstand him?

  “You’re coming back?” Marissa let out such a sigh of relief he must have heard it. And this time, she didn’t care.

  Travis pulled her into the circle of his arms and kissed her on the forehead. “I wouldn’t leave you alone at a time like this.” Just having him near made her feel so much better. “I have to sort out a few things at home, Jonah included, then I’ll be back.”

  Marissa stood at the door, her heart sinking as he drove away. Don’t be so damned stupid she admonished herself. He’ll be back soon.

  Shoulders slumped, Marissa turned and walked back inside, then busied herself tidying up the house. She’d done virtually nothing today – so much for getting stuck into the new novel.

  Travis had been there all day; he’d been by her side almost every moment of the day. How she would have survived without him, Marissa didn’t know.

  How would she continue to exist without him when she went back to Melbourne? Marissa swallowed hard. Losing Jeremy had been hard, almost unfathomable, but losing Travis would be harder, much harder.

  It was something she hadn’t thought about for a very long time. She’d been living in Daniel’s house for over three months now. In all probability, she had less than three months to go before she had to leave – forever.

  She didn’t want to think about it.

  ***

  Marissa was vacuuming, and hadn’t heard the knock at the door.

  The banging on the window startled her.

  She looked up to see Travis standing there, pointing to a large cardboard box. He was mouthing something at her. Let me in, he seemed to be saying.

  Marissa was curious. What was in the box – something for dinner? It looked more like a cake box than a pizza box.

  She shrugged her shoulders. She would find out soon enough.

  “Don’t drop the box, whatever you do.” Travis handed her the box as he sailed through the door. He held a large shopping bag as well. “And don’t frown,” he said, brushing his fingers across her forehead, causing Marissa to shiver involuntarily.

  “Animal, vegetable, or mineral?” she asked, heading for the sofa.

  “Open it and find out.” He wasn’t giving anything away, the rat.

  Marissa put her ear to the box, when she heard what sounded like a scratching noise. A bird? Was there a cage in that bag?

  There were tiny holes in the box and she peered in.

  “Cheat!” he told her, dropping the bag on the floor near her feet.

  “I can’t see what it is, anyway.” She opened the box as carefully as she could. “Oh, Travis. She is so beautiful.” Marissa pulled the tortoise-shell kitten out of the box, and held it to her chest. She patted the seat next to her and Travis sat down.

  “Meeoooow.” The tiny sound lifted Marissa’s heart.

  “Thank you!” She leaned across and lightly kissed Travis on the lips. “Has she got a name? Is she toilet trained? Has she had her injections?” Marissa was getting carried away, she knew she was, but couldn’t stop herself. “What am I going to feed her?”

  Marissa stood up, taking the kitten with her. She headed straight for the kitchen, looking for milk.

  She could feel his gaze on her back. Knowing Travis, he was more than likely laughing at her, but she had no intention of turning around to check.

  “Should I warm the milk or will she drink it cold?” Travis put his fingers over her lips, bringing her words to a halt.

  “You’re babbling.” He laughed and Marissa realized he was joking with her again. “Okay, let’s start at the beginning. No, she hasn’t got a name. No, she’s not toilet trained, but yes, she’s had all her injections.”

  “She’s not toilet trained? Right, that’s your job – you brought her here.” Marissa smiled, then placed a bowl of warm milk in the laundry, along with the kitty litter tray, and some kitten food that Travis had brought.

  He’d also purchased a cat basket complete with suitable bedding.

  Satisfied that the kitten, who now had a name – Ceefor, C for cat – was settled into her new home in the laundry, Marissa closed the door wondering what to cook for dinner. Travis must surely be getting hungry by now.

  Marissa made her way to the kitchen and stood staring into the open-doored refrigerator, wondering what she could do with the little that was available. After all, she hadn’t shopped for two weeks as a result of her deception to Travis.

  “Forget it,” Travis told her. “My shout. Do you want to go out, or eat in?” She probably looked a mess after the day she’d had. Maybe eating in would be best?

  “In, please. And we’ll go Dutch.”

  “The hell we will. This is my treat.” Travis came up behind her, rubbing his hands up and down her arms. It felt so wonderful, if only it could go on forever.

  Stubborn, that’s what he was. Stubborn. “Then I’ll supply the drinks.” That much she could do. If only the rest of her decisions were that easy.

  “The choice has to be yours,” Travis told her. “But if it were me, I’d want someone here with me.”

  He watched as Marissa warred with herself. He didn’t want to leave her alone for the night, but if that was what she wanted, who was he to argue?

  “Stay. I want you to stay.” She looked apologetic. “It’s not like I don’t want you, it’s just that,” – she shrugged her shoulders – “It’s all too hard. Decisions are tough for me right now.”

  He understood. He knew where she was coming from. Hell, her emotions must be all over the place.

  This time he’d come prepared. Travis retrieved a small overnight case from the car.

  It would be hard, lying in bed next to her, and not touching her in a sexual way.

  His mind drifted back to that night on the rug. He’d never see that rug in quite the same way again.

  Marissa stood in the open doorway watching him. She wore a slinky satin nightie. Didn’t she know what she did to him? How would he survive the night with her, when she was wearing something like that?

  Travis decided he’d never seen anything or anyone, quite so provocative as the beauty standing before him at this very moment.

  Whoa boy! He told himself. Nothing sexual, remember. You are here purely to comfort a friend.

  If he continued to remind himself, everything would be all right. At least, that’s how it was supposed to work.

  Chapter Six

  Travis was wide awake.

  He couldn’t remember a night that was quite so hard. Yikes – what a choice of words!

  Marissa had stood at the end of the bed for a virtual eternity. He wanted to help her, tell her everything was fine, but he couldn’t give her that guarantee.

  God help him – he wanted to take her pain away. He wanted to hold her in his arms, and wanted to love her and make love to her, for the rest of her life. The rest of his life.

  Travis wanted everything to be normal, for her.

  Marissa was finally asleep. He’d lay watching her for hours, listening to her breathing. She tossed and turned, and Travis thought she would never settle.

  Four a.m. Now he was doing Marissa’s trick. Staying awake all night. He was determined not to wake her. She definitely needed all the sleep she could get.

  Travis pulled t
he comforter further up over her shoulders, and Marissa rolled onto her side and snuggled against him.

  Damn! It was really testing having her so close. Her arm came up around him, then he heard her indrawn breath. She sounded startled.

  Had she forgotten he was there? Possibly. She wasn’t used to another person in the bed.

  Travis whispered his assurance, and Marissa rolled away from him, and back into sleep.

  He lay awake for another forty minutes, finally deciding to get up. He was so far awake now that he might just as well get up and do some work. He’d lost an entire day’s work yesterday, not that he was really bothered, but he might as well try to catch up while he could.

  Predicting another day away from home, he’d had the foresight to bring some paperwork back with him.

  Carefully, cautiously, he climbed out of bed. He slipped his bathrobe on, then as noiselessly as possible, went into the dining room where he sat at the table for some time working.

  Travis ran his fingers through his ruffled hair. He couldn’t concentrate. Maybe he should go back to bed; he might get to sleep this time.

  He decided instead to make himself some coffee, then try and work a little longer. That way, he would be well and truly ready for sleep.

  Six a.m. The sun was up. Roosters were crowing somewhere in the distance, and large semis were heading toward their destinations.

  Travis was beyond sleep. He downed his second, or was it third, cup of coffee, and was about to tackle something a little more complicated.

  Marissa’s piercing screams echoed through the stillness of the early morning. A throbbing ache ripped his heart in two. Travis had hoped the nightmares had ended when Marissa opened her soul to him.

  He ran to her side in the shortest possible time, then cradled her head against his chest. His arms came up around her back, and Marissa slipped hers around his waist.

  She was still half asleep, and sobbing. She tried desperately to get out of the bed, and if that was what she wanted, he’d better let her, Travis acknowledged.

  It was almost as though she wasn’t awake; her eyes were closed, and she didn’t say a word to him. Maybe she was still asleep?

  Travis stood beside her, his arms tightly wrapped around her. Marissa seemed to understand he was there, and rested her head on his shoulder.

  How could he exorcise her demons? He was sure that talking about Jeremy would rid her of them forever. Apparently not.

  ***

  Marissa sat on a fold up chair in the back yard. The view was simply breathtaking.

  To the left, rolling hills and paddocks jotted with cows and sheep, to the right, mountain views, and straight ahead was the forest.

  Travis was asleep. Poor guy – she’d given him a hard time and he’d barely slept.

  His work was spread out over the dining room table, and that’s exactly where she left it. Marissa didn’t want to try and clean it up, in case she put it out of order. No point making life harder than it already was.

  It was getting close to lunchtime. Travis wanted to be woken by two at the latest he said. Otherwise he’d never sleep tonight.

  Marissa sat stroking Ceefor as she purred to her heart’s content. It was so nice having a kitten around again. Except for the toilet training, that was. She’d already cleaned up a couple of small puddles today.

  Still, Ceefor was young – she’d learn quickly. At least Marissa hoped she would.

  A noise behind her alerted Marissa that she was no longer alone.

  “Hey, sleepy head.” She reached up and touched Travis on the arm, and Ceefor scampered off her lap.

  “Hey, yourself.” He was so darned sexy, it was almost killing her just to look at him. He had on his black jeans, the ones that always got her heart racing. They were only half zipped, and his chest was bare. How could she survive?

  Marissa’s eyes slowly travelled from the top of his beautiful head right down to his bare and sexy feet. The air between them sizzled.

  She felt the heat creep into her cheeks as she realized Travis was watching her.

  Travis laughed. “Had a good look?”

  “Guess so.” She shrugged her shoulders at him. “Would’ve been better if you didn’t have those jeans on, though.” Did she really say that?

  Travis squatted down beside her, and Marissa wrapped her arms around his neck. She leaned in and kissed him square on the lips. Life was so complicated, and she was making it even more complicated with her reactions.

  She was lost in his kiss, his arms, his lovemaking. Travis deepened the kiss, and Marissa felt her nipples tighten into tiny little peaks as Travis slid his hand leisurely along her thigh.

  “Oh, my, God,” she heard herself whisper.

  “Ditto,” Travis whispered back.

  They stood together, still in their embrace, and Travis lifted Marissa into his arms, then strode into the house.

  “Are you sure you want this?” he asked.

  Marissa nodded confidently, then leaned forward and began the kiss again.

  Travis stood at the bedroom door. “Last chance to change your mind,” he asked.

  “I’m absolutely positive.” This was what she wanted. And she was sure it was what Travis wanted too.

  Her eyes searched the room. It was no longer a cold, harrowing place to sleep. It seemed to have new warmth. It was a place of comfort now, not a place of terror.

  She scanned the clothes thrown hurriedly on the floor, the comforter ruffled beyond belief, and the pillow scrunched into a little bundle where Travis had laid his head.

  The room had somehow undergone a transformation. It had become a haven. Travis had given Marissa back her life.

  ***

  Travis stood under the warm water of the shower, Marissa next to him. He needed a shower to wake him up. Not that he really needed waking up. Marissa had done that.

  Maybe he should have had a cold shower? An icy cold one.

  He looked down at Marissa. Her hair was pinned back into a neat little bun, so that it wouldn’t get wet.

  His eyes travelled further down. He licked his lips as he gazed at her shoulders. Her beautiful bare shoulders.

  Those shoulders just turned him on.

  Boy oh boy – so did those breasts. Those wonderful breasts with their tiny little buds, just waiting for him to touch them, to suckle them, and to tantalize them.

  Travis rubbed his soap-covered hands over Marissa’s back. He loved the feel of her; he loved to touch her – anywhere. And she wasn’t complaining either. She had her hands lathered up too, and was roaming his body. Her tiny hands were moving in circles all over his buttocks.

  Oh Lord, how could he cope?

  She picked up the soap again and lathered her hands once more, this time rubbing his chest; around and around in tiny circles, then bigger and bigger. Travis felt the friction of the soap, and Marissa’s hands, running through the hair on his chest.

  “It’s definitely time to get out of here,” Travis whispered. He lifted Marissa’s chin with his fingers, and kissed her lips as the water continued to run over them, tantalizing and tormenting him even more.

  Marissa lifted one leg and wrapped it around his thigh, and Travis turned off the water.

  He passed Marissa a towel without a word, and they dried each other off.

  Travis lifted her and gently carried her into the bedroom. He stood at the doorway, then looked at the bed.

  He threw back the rumpled comforter then carefully laid Marissa on the bed. He looked her up and down. He wanted to know every nook and cranny. Wanted to know what made her tick, what make her laugh, and what made her cry.

  She looked so fragile, so vulnerable, and oh so loveable. He knew she could be a veritable tiger when she wanted. But she was vulnerable, and he’d needed to keep that in mind.

  He kneeled on the bed in front of her, and Marissa sat up. Her arms around his neck, her touch, even her gaze, were enough to turn him on.

  Man, did he have it bad.

 
Slowly he laid her down, then lightly kissed her cheek. But it wasn’t enough.

  His lips slid to her mouth, and Marissa opened her lips to him. He was sure he would explode when their tongues met.

  She tasted sweet, but what else did he expect?

  He slowly worked his way down, gently suckling on her neck, trying not to leave little marks, love bites. He was sure she wouldn’t like that.

  Then Travis found himself at her sweet, inviting breasts. He leisurely slid his tongue across each one. With each movement, his arousal grew even more. He found himself almost straddled across her, and was sure he would make a fool of himself if he weren’t careful.

  He felt the gentle touch of Marissa’s fingers as they slid over his back. He tensed. Not because he didn’t want her, but because he wanted to prolong these moments as long as possible.

  He heard her groan, soft and low, but with pleasure.

  Her hands moved lower, over his buttocks, urging him to move lower still.

  His fingers slid to her abdomen, and over her hips. Oh Lord, how much more could he endure?

  Not much, he was sure.

  Marissa’s hands slid up around him, urging him on, and her legs slid open. And that was the end for Travis. He couldn’t wait any longer. He needed her, and now!

  Quickly shoving a condom over himself, he pushed himself into her, slowly and gently. It felt so good. Hell! It felt wonderful.

  He looked into Marissa’s face. He didn’t want to cause her any more emotional pain.

  Was she coping all right?

  Marissa lifted her hands, and cupped his face, pulling Travis close, kissing his lips.

  Yep, she was fine.

  He moved slowly, pushing harder and harder, quicker and quicker, thrust after agonizing thrust. He had to hold on.

  He felt his arousal growing bigger still. He couldn’t remember feeling so big, so hard. So damned aroused.

  Marissa moved with him, her legs wrapped around him. She shuddered beneath him and he felt her orgasm begin. That was the end for him. Travis emptied himself into her as they became orgasmic together.