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A Winter Sabbatical (Books We Love holiday romance) Page 3
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She looked up at him, her tear-drenched face red and puffy. Her eyes red and swollen.
“No one can help me,” she said between sobs, as she pulled away from him.
Her words tore at his heart, broke it into pieces. If only she would let him inside her mind, tell him what was eating her up. Maybe then he could fix whatever was doing this to her.
He felt an emptiness like he’d never experienced before. Deep down in his belly. In his whole being. Like he was being ripped apart, bit by bit. Moment by moment. Heartbeat by heartbeat.
“What the—?” He watched dumbfounded as Marissa suddenly pulled herself away from him, and into a sitting position. Then she was standing. Damn she was quick!
He shook himself, trying to make sense of the situation. Was it something he did, or was there more to it?
Okay, that was stupid. Of course there was more to it. There was so much more to Marissa Temple than it appeared.
He pulled himself up to her level.
She stood in front of him, acting as though nothing had happened. With a smile on her face!
“I have to go home now. Please. I have to set up my office tomorrow, so I can start working. No work, no money.” She shrugged her shoulders, as though it was an inconvenience that she had to abide.
He was incredulous! What the hell was she hiding? What was it that made her life a misery? That was eating her up inside?
He looked at her, stared her in the face. Watched her fight her emotions and pull herself together.
She might fool herself, but she sure wasn’t fooling him.
“That’s a cop-out and we both know it.” Travis reached out and took both her hands in his. He lowered his voice and leaned in closer. “Why won’t you talk about it? Get it out of your system. You’ll feel better, I know you will.” As he lifted her hands and kissed them lightly, a tiny shiver wracked his body. He had to make her feel better, rid her of this curse. The thing that made her so incredibly unhappy.
Marissa shook her head and Travis knew it was fruitless to push her further.
“Okay, come on then. I’ll drive you home.” He reached for his car keys. “If you really want to get your office set up, I’ll come over tomorrow and help you.” She didn’t answer, so he continued. “I should have done that today. Why didn’t you ask me?”
She simply stared at him, as though she didn’t know what to say.
When she shrugged her shoulders, then studied the floor, Travis decided to make a joke of it. “Oh, I know, you wanted an excuse to get me to come back, right?”
Marissa punched him lightly on the arm. “You big lug!” she said as she wrapped her arms around him. “Thanks, Travis.”
“For what?”
She looked up into his face. “For just being here.”
***
Marissa was silent during the drive home. Travis glanced across and noticed the quiver of her bottom lip. He could see unshed tears glistening in the limited light, but made no comment. Instead, he held her hand, and gently squeezed it.
Marissa glanced at him, but still said nothing. He watched as she brushed at her cheeks with the back of her hand.
In his mind, he went over and over the events of the day; their traumatic meeting, working side-by-side in a companionable silence, and later, snuggled up together by the fire. That was by far the best part, until...
For the first time in his life, Travis had found someone he cared about. Really cared about.
It wasn’t about lust, or even togetherness. Even after one day he knew this was a person he could come to love. Maybe even spend the rest of his life with.
But this thing, whatever it was eating her up, could destroy their relationship before it began.
He had no intention of losing her now that fate had finally thrown them together.
This was going to take some time; probably a lot of time, and plenty of patience.
He could do that. He would do that. He wasn’t prepared to lose Marissa. Had no intention of losing her. He would be there for the long haul.
Travis silently pulled into her driveway.
Chapter Two
Marissa opened the front door with a sense of trepidation as Travis approached. She was feeling embarrassed about her behavior the night before. Travis leaned forward and brushed a light kiss on her lips, taking her by surprise.
“Would you like some coffee?” Marissa tried to ignore his actions.
Travis shrugged his shoulders and chuckled. “Coffee would be wonderful.” He followed her into the kitchen and helped prepare the coffee. “So what’s on the agenda? Just the office, or do you have some little surprises planned?”
Marissa smiled at him. “No, just the office. I really appreciate your help, Travis. I was going to ring someone to come out. Are you sure you can spare the time? I don’t mind really, if you can’t.”
Travis frowned. “Of course I don’t mind, I wouldn’t have offered if I couldn’t. Anyway, you planned it this way, so I’d come back, remember?” Another chuckle, a broad smile.
“Oh yes, I forgot. Silly me!” laughed Marissa, as she began to pour the coffee.
Cup in hand, Travis followed her into the office, and they stood in the doorway surveying the layout.
“You’ve got a lot more computer stuff than Daniel had, but I think it should still fit all right.” The movers had placed Marissa’s desk in position, but all her other equipment was spread over the floor. “I think we should start with the computer, and work from there.” He glanced across at Marissa, as though looking for her approval.
“Sure, it’s your show. I have no idea about these things, except how to use them.”
Travis’s raised his eyebrows.
“Why do you think I was going to pay someone, silly? I’m not a computer technician. It would be a sorry state if I were! Anyway, you’ll need to leave enough room beside the computer for the modem because I have to connect to the Internet.”
She moved into the room, pointing at things as she discussed them. “The phone and printer needs to be fairly nearby, but the scanner and fax can go anywhere they can fit. There should be enough connections for everything. Daniel had pretty much the same set-up, I believe.” She stopped for a breather.
Travis let out a loud chuckle. “Finished yet bossy boots? That’s exactly what I had in mind.”
It was Marissa’s turn to laugh. “Sure you did! Oh, and I’ve got a few reference books I need to fit in somewhere, but that’s not important now. I’d like to put that extra easy chair that’s clogging up the lounge, in here too. I’ve got a small side table to go next to it.”
“I thought this was your working room? You gonna loaf off?” He chuckled again – every time he did that, Marissa found herself endeared to him more and more.
“Right, that’s it you big lug! It’s my thinking chair – cut the cheek and get to work! Maybe, just maybe, there’ll be a reward at the end of the day.” With that, she turned and walked out of the room, leaving a smiling Travis to stare after her.
Travis emerged from the office just over an hour later. “Marissa. Marissa, where are you? Hey, something sure smells good!” He found her in the kitchen, stacking the last of the mixing bowls in the dishwasher.
“Hi! I hope you like scones, Travis. That’s your reward. Oh, you have finished, haven’t you? You don’t get to collect until you have, you know!”
A mock frown covered his face. “Scones are my reward? I thought you were my reward. But hey, scones will do for starters!”
“Sit down. Please? I’m sorry, but I don’t have any jam and cream, just butter.”
Travis helped himself to a scone. “Wow, you can cook! This would be really hard to get used to, I must say. What else can you cook? Let’s see, can you cook Pavlova? And I love apple pie, or maybe—”
Laughing, Marissa interrupted him. “Hey you, slow down. I’m here to work, remember. You’d have me cooking for you all day long by the sounds of things. Just eat your scones and be grateful.”
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She put a cup of coffee in front of him and sat in the chair opposite, looking down into her own cup. “I want to apologize about yesterday. I’m not usually a helpless, weeping female. I really can stand on my own two feet. I guess the move has, well, stirred up a lot of emotions. I’m really sorry.”
Travis reached over and touched her cheek. “No need to apologize. Besides, I love helpless, weeping females.” Laughing now. “That means I get to kiss them better. Hey, don’t punch me up. I didn’t mean it!”
***
“Well, Marissa, I think the place is pretty much ship-shape. You can start working anytime you want now. Is there anything else you’d like me to do? Move furniture, make pancakes, kiss you?”
Marissa tried to conceal her amusement at Travis’s suggestion of a kiss in his normal conversation, and wagged a finger at him. “I do need something, but I hate to ask.”
“Ask away.”
Marissa hated relying on other people, but right now, she had no choice. “I only brought the basic essentials with me, so I need some supplies. Groceries, that is. You probably didn’t notice, but I don’t have a car. I didn’t need one in the city, I don’t even have a license.”
Travis looked down at her, shocked. “No, I didn’t notice. You’ll never survive out here without a car. But, you can always ring me. Ah-ha! I’ve worked it out. It was just another excuse for inviting me over! Marissa, get your coat, we’re going shopping.”
“Travis, this place is just full of surprises. Who would have guessed – an old-fashioned grocery store? I should have made this move years ago.”
Travis put his arm around Marissa, and drew her close. “I couldn’t agree more. Do you want to go home now, or would you like to look around the town?”
Marissa’s eyes lit up. “Can we go to the Pet Shop, so I can see the kittens? Please?”
“Sure, why not? You really do love cats, don’t you?” Travis’s laughter told Marissa this question needed no reply. He packed the groceries into the boot of the car, and they strolled down the road to the Pet Shop.
“Oh, Travis, they’re just gorgeous. Especially that little tortoise-shell one, she’s just beautiful. Do you think they’ll let me hold her?”
“What makes you think it’s a she? It might be a boy-cat.” Marissa just loved it when Travis teased her.
“You don’t know your cats too well, do you?” Now it was her turn to tease. “Tortoise-shells are only ever female. There are no boy-cats in tortoise shell.”
The assistant was walking towards them, a look of surprise on her face. “Well, well. Most people don’t know that fact. You certainly know your cats. Would you like to hold her for a minute, Miss?”
Travis laughed loudly. “Hello, Lisa. I think it would make her day if she could – she’s drooling over that little bundle of fur. Lisa, this is Marissa. She’s moved into Daniel’s place for a few months.”
Lisa acknowledged Marissa, then reached into the enclosure and passed the kitten over to her.
“How’s your Mum and Dad, Travis? I haven’t seen them lately."
“They’ve been on holidays.”
"Say ‘Hi’ from me when you see them.”
As Marissa held the kitten, patting it, her thoughts ran away with her. She felt oddly attracted to Travis. She’d never fallen for anyone like this. Well, why not? she asked herself. He’s witty, he’s fun, patient and most of all, nice to be around. And she felt comfortable with him.
Then again, she told herself, why should you worry? You don’t want a relationship with anyone, let alone this near stranger.
She busied herself with the tiny creature cuddled up in her arms. “Travis, feel how soft her fur is.” Marissa rubbed her cheek along the little bundle’s head, and felt duly rewarded with its little pink tongue washing her fingers. “Guess I’d better give her back now, before I get too attached.” She sighed as she handed the kitten back to the assistance.
“Don’t worry Marissa, you can hold Jonah any time you like.” Travis gave her shoulders a squeeze. “Come on. I know just the thing to cheer you up. Let’s go for a drive. I’ll show you some of the local sights.”
They walked back to the car in silence, and then Travis drove to a spot just out of Maldon.
When they arrived, Travis suggested a short walk, and wanting to see a little of the local area, Marissa agreed.
Travis climbed the incline into the shadowy trees dragging Marissa beside him.
Marissa enjoyed being there with Travis, as much as she told herself she shouldn’t. She enjoyed the adventure of this new place, but mostly, she decided, she just enjoyed being with him. She really liked Travis, and felt protected and safe out there with him.
They walked for some time, before they came to a standstill in a small, protected area; it was almost what Marissa would call an alcove. The whole area was covered with creeping vines, which formed a kind of canopy.
She looked around; it was dark, dreary in a way. “Don’t you think we should be heading back now, Travis?” The sun was reclining over the skyline, and soon darkness would surround them. It would be pitch black in this little spot.
“Don’t worry, I’ll look after you.”
“I know you will.” Did he think she didn’t trust him?
“I just wanted to show you this place. I come here when I need to think; it’s a kind of retreat, I guess.” He gestured to the area surrounding them, and Marissa thought this would be a great place to sit and write.
“And you need to think now?” He looked very serious, but was he?
Travis shrugged and his expression suddenly changed. Now he was smiling. “It’s cozy here, very romantic.” He was joking again – she’d let him have his fun. “Let’s stay a little longer.” He moved closer and put his arm around Marissa’s shoulders and she shivered.
As Travis looked down into her face, their eyes met. His voice dropped almost to a whisper. “They must be the deepest brown eyes I’ve ever seen.” His fingers played along her jaw, and when they slid to her lips, Marissa thought she would just die if he didn’t kiss her.
She opened her mouth slightly, and her tongue touched his fingers. They were soft, gentle, but at the same time, powerful. Marissa shuddered.
She reached down and took his hand. Their fingers entwined. Marissa’s other hand slid up into his hair. Travis pulled his fingers away from her mouth, as though they were burned. She licked her lips. Travis’ eyes followed her every move.
He leaned into her, and Marissa was sure he was about to kiss her, wanted him to kiss her. He suddenly pulled back, and a sense of loss overcame her.
“Come on, let’s go – before I change my mind.” His fingers again played along her lips, as though drawn there, and Marissa wanted more, desperately wanted more, but knew she would regret it the very moment their lips met.
She hugged Travis, briefly, but sincerely – a kind of silent ‘thanks’ – and then they made their way back to the car.
Would she ever be truly happy again?
***
Travis sat at the kitchen table, watching relentlessly as Marissa unpacked the groceries; his gaze almost burning her.
“You want to stay for dinner?” she asked, at a loss of what else to say. The air between them seemed a little tense. She could force him to talk about their rendezvous, but perhaps it was better left unsaid.
“Thanks, but no thanks. I’d better get home. It’s past Jonah’s feeding time. Besides, if I stay, who knows what might happen.” He grinned at her. “On second thought—”
Travis pushed back his chair, noisily scraping it across the floor. Grin plastered across his face, he started toward Marissa, arms outstretched.
“Take that grin off your face, and just behave yourself!” Marissa was laughing – he was such a card at times.
Her heart skipped a beat; she didn’t really want him to leave. “I think you’re right, you’d better go now. Thanks for everything.”
“Just like that? You’d send me away, just
like that?” He was joking again. He was just what she needed, Marissa reflected; some laughter and frivolity in her life.
Putting on pretense of rejection, Travis opened the front door. “See you tomorrow?” He leaned forward and lightly kissed her cheek. Marissa’s skin felt like it was burning.
“Not tomorrow – sorry. I’ve got to do some work. Maybe in a day or so.”
Shoulders slumped, and this time looking truly rejected, Travis walked out the front door.
“Hey, Travis. Wait.” Marissa called after him.
“Changed your mind already?” Now grinning, Travis started to walk back through the door.
Pushing him out again, Marissa handed him a piece of paper. “It’s just my phone number. Now go home.”
Travis opened his mouth to speak at the same time the phone started to ring.
“Sorry got to go. See you later.” Marissa quickly closed the door and went to answer the phone.
“Hello. Oh, hi Mum. Yes, I’m fine. Nearly everything is unpacked now. You’ll never guess. I’ve met a friend of Daniel’s; Travis – Travis Johnston. He’s really nice; he even took me into town to do my shopping. What? No Mum, he’s not married.
“Yes, I know – best to keep my distance. What? Mum this is a really bad line. What did you say? You know I’m trying to forget about... the... Mum, it’s really hard.” Tears began trickling down Marissa’s face. “I have to go. I’ll call later in the week. Yeah, bye.”
Hanging up the phone, Marissa began to sob uncontrollably.
***
Travis phoned consistently every day for the next week. As much as she wanted to, Marissa wouldn’t see him; she couldn’t afford to get close to anyone, let alone Travis Johnston – who she felt so attracted to.
Travis refused to give up, and Saturday morning dropped in unannounced.
“I’ll make the coffee,” he said, “While you get ready.” He strode off into the kitchen as if he owned the place.